Heyy, it’s been long…I know. As always, I have no excuse. Buttt, here’s the thing, I have been relying on my motivation and if there’s anything to be learned from my previous post, you’ll realize that I have always posted about my lack of motivation. Well…here’s proof!
Okay I’m just going to get into the whole catching up thing.
Firstly, I graduated. Yayy me! and guess what?, I graduated with a First Class. Yeah, you read right. Even as I type this post, I still don’t know how I feel about it. But here’s the thing though, I think I feel…underwhelmed. Don’t get me wrong, I am super thankful and grateful to God for this achievement. I worked really hard for this, like seriously, I got sick because I was soo stressed out BECAUSE of how hard I worked and how overwhelmed I felt throughout the year. But the thing is, I don’t feel like it’s a personal achievement. It almost feels like I am proud of someone and it’s not me.
Does that make sense? I don’t know. I am happy this happened to me, and I know that I am proud of myself but it’s almost like I can’t believe this happened to me. I can’t explain this feeling, I can’t even distinguish the emotions I feel when I think about it. It borders between peace and numbness. Like am I happy and at peace with how everything turned out or do I just not care enough about this achievement to feel like I achieved it? God, please help me understand.
Moving on to where I sort of am right now. Right now, I need a job. Not just any job though, I need a job that checks into all or most of the requirements on my list of what an amazing job looks like to me. And I am here to manifest it. By God’s Grace and Infinite mercies, I will get an amazing Placement, Graduate Job or Job that is best suited for me and the best time, hopefully, but the date I have in my heart but I’ll be happy with God’s will nonetheless.
This brings me to another update. In case, you haven’t noticed just from all I’ve been typing, my spiritual life is doing really well. I feel really good about my relationship with God and I hope this feeling is forever. I trust God more, I trust in God’s decisions concerning my life and most of all, I strongly believe that God loves me, listens to me and wants the best for me. isn’t that amazing?! Can I get a hallelujah?! Too much?…sorry lol.
Okay, that’s pretty much it for this post.I hope whoever reads this receives amazing news sometime this week. All the best!!